Sunday, April 26, 2009

...not after today

“I can't fight my feelings. I am attracted to her. Emotionally too.” he said.

Her heart stopped beating for a moment. She couldn’t breathe.
“Say something” he said.

“What do you want me to say to that?” she said breathing again.

“I am telling you because I don’t want to cheat on you. I can’t handle the guilt. And I don’t even know if I can meet you again.”

“I know what you mean. You will not have to cheat on me. Not after today” she said.

He could hear the sound of her heart shatter as she disconnected the line.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

In the Company of a Kid

Say KIDS and the first thing that comes screaming to my mind is ENERGY!!!

Where do they get all that energy from? They hardly eat anything, take hours to drink a glass of milk, but the stamina they have to talk, play, jump, laugh and sometimes to cry their guts out is unbelievable. They need no reason to smile and laugh without inhibitions. They so effortlessly make us laugh too. They have the most amazing sense of humour!

We can never escape their embarrassing questions. They seem to have mastered the art of embarrassing the grown-ups. And no answer we give them is good enough. With their short attention span they keep our minds running and chasing their thoughts all the time. They are inqusitive and restless all the time to touch, feel and question about everything that catches their eye. They are scared of weird things and always have stories to tell. An empty coke can, a small match box or even a paper napkin will keep them occupied for hours.

I have a neighbour who has a 3 year old and a 3 months old. I spend atleast an hour with them everyday. The mother sometimes has a tough time handling both of them. Imagine trying to put the little one to sleep while the older one refuses to stop yelling or demands all attention telling some tale with all the excitement possible.

Sometimes it is difficult to imagine that we too were as innocent and happy as a child. Play with a kid for some un-ingibited laughter. It sure is a stress buster. And ofcourse, they are capable of teaching us a lot.

Monday, April 13, 2009

A Wife’s Perspective.

My views/opinions expressed here are from the perspective of a wife, based on the observations, discussions and exchange of experiences from the past couple of years. These are questions that I am sure all of us have asked ourselves at some point or the other.

When a girl gets married, she is expected to bring changes in her behavior, expectations and her lifestyle, to suit that of her husband’s. She is expected to leave her family behind and adapt to her ‘new family.’ Her parents tell her ‘now they are your parents. You must listen to them and obey them.’

But what is expected of a boy getting married? Is he told that now he has another set of parents he needs to obey? Does he bring about changes in his lifestyle? Does he leave his dreams and expectations behind?

A woman who obeys her husband and in-laws is a ‘good wife’ but a man who obeys his wife is ‘henpecked’?? The change somehow seems to come very naturally to women. Men change too. But, they are criticized saying ‘he has changed after marriage.’ Display of emotions or change of priorities is considered a sign of weakness in men.

A woman does not worry that her parents might get insecure after her marriage, but, a man does. Why is that? Is it because the woman’s parents are very secure of their relationship with their daughter? OR because they ‘willingly accept’ the fact that she now has her family and priorities? OR may be both! They are happy that the husband becomes the most important person in her life. And the wife has no qualms admitting/declaring the same.

How often do you come across sons who openly admit that their wife is the most important person in his life? Well, it’s not because she is not, but because by saying so he could be hurting his parents. It would make them a little (or may be a lot) insecure. Men prefer being diplomatic in such matters. They want to keep everybody happy. (Atleast that’s what they think they are doing.)

When a son takes care of his parents’ needs and securities he is considered to be doing his duties. When a daughter does the same, people call her parents a liability. Why? Does a girl love her parents any less than a boy?

I have heard a lot of parents praise their sons-in-law openly but haven’t come across parents praising their daughters-in-law. Not even 1/4th of what they brag about their own sons or daughters. It is very easy to say ‘she is lucky to be married into our family’ but how often do they consider the possibility that the family is probably luckier to have her?

This could be never ending. All I want to say is be fair and get real. Don’t treat a woman any different from a man. Long gone are the days when the daughter-in-laws would listen to any crap just because it is coming from her husband or in-laws. She is staying with her in-laws does not mean she prefers not staying with her parents. Stop challenging the daughters-in-law. Why risk spoiling a relationship before it has even had a chance to grow?

All these could be minor issues and quite common too. It is natural that in any new relationship there will be insecurities. How well you deal with them depends on how sensitive you are. Everybody has their side of the story…parents, husbands and in-laws. Most of us (the women) are lucky to have the capability and maturity to understand the intricacies of relationships and how to work around them. Some of us are lucky to have in-laws who are more broad-minded than others. But all of us are lucky to be women. We have a mind strong enough to admit our priorities.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Spiritual Joy Ride

Everybody has life changing experiences in their lives. I am no exception. Mine was like a joy ride, bungee jumping, scuba diving and paragliding put together. Can you imagine that? Anybody who has done the ‘Art of Living’ knows what I mean.

His Holiness Sri Sri Ravi Shankar, fondly referred to as ‘Guruji’ and ‘Guru Dev’ is the founder of Art of Living Organisation. He is one of the most charismatic persons I have ever come across. His aura, grace and poise will leave you enthralled.

For almost 7 years, before I did the first course, a lot of people told me about the Art of Living. I must agree that I had a lot of misconceptions about the Art of Living before I did the course. I was apprehensive and unsure. And then one day I enrolled for the Basic Course. And trust me when I say I have been at peace with myself ever since. I am focused and contented. I experience spirituality. I am happier, healthier and stronger. I am aware. It is something that one can only experience. It is an out-of-the world experience.

One major misconception that people have is the Art of Living is for people who are sad and suffering. The Art of Living is for everybody who breathes. For everybody who believes in life. And the ones who don’t believe in life haven’t experienced it yet. Those of you, who know what I am talking about, will agree with me. And those who haven’t heard of the Art of Living or considered it yet, go ahead and do yourselves a favor. It is no less than a joy ride. And, you will never regret it.

For more facts follow the links:
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: The Peoples Guru
Experiences across the Globe
Indo-Pakistan Youth Peace Initiatives
Art of Living Service Projects

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Laugh for Wrinkles

Laugh a lot, and when you're older, all your wrinkles will be in the right places.~ by Anonymous ~

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

After a long break

I have been away for a loooong loooong time. I was in India for a month and came back home last week. I had very limited access to the internet the last one month. Now I know I have a lot to catch up on. 3 things I missed terribly the last one month were my husband, my turtles and the blogs I ardently read. I had a lot of stuff to do while I was there and have a lot more stuff to do now. By now, I am sure, some of my friends would be thinking I am dead or something.

I did a lot of furniture shop hunting, window shopping, met up with friends. I saw Delhi 6. What a disaster the movie is. Slumdog Millionaire was nice and enjoyed Dev D. I watched Dev D it with 2 of my cousins and my mom. Taking mom along was a bad idea but it was too late by the time we realised that. She couldn’t leave ‘coz it was a late night show. I kinda like Abhay Deol. He looks good and acts well. He is a ‘paisa vasool’ for me.

The day I was leaving Shalini (one of my best friends and one of my fav. People) gave me a great news!!!! I will not reveal it yet (I am a little superstitious you see.)

After the activity filled break, I am back all geared up and charged. Most of all, I am glad I am back home.